This bank Holiday Monday I planned to:
work on my last few assignments (lets hope they are the last few!),
a presentation which I no longer have the tolerance or patience for!
Practise for another interview i might have soon sigh,
Go out for a run (that was the intention instead had a salad for lunch
followed by two scoops for chocolate ice-cream)
re-evaluate my life
this bank holiday Monday i am:
fed up, i didn't get the job i wanted to, and have had enough of
people telling me 'it'll be ok' and "maybe it wasn't meant to be"
or "they're are better jobs out there"
look I get it I've just had enough of people telling me the same thing again and again,
I've stuck a mental post it up there to remind myself to never say that to anyone.
really tired despite sleeping for over 10 hours, the hypochondriac in me is coming up with all sorts of aliments (swine flu not being one thou!!)
not really wanting to know of all the people who seem to have died over the last few days, I didn't really know them so do I really need to know? (yes I know it sounds insensitive but that's how I feel)
wondering what I would do if in 6 months time I didn't have a job, money and was being evicted from my home.
pondering about how life always is worse for someone else, I mean i could have swine flu, cancer and be a lot more miserable.
A friend tells me at least I have my limbs, what is someone meant to say in reply to that?
all I could muster up was you want mine?
I wouldn't support that response, especially since they've been hell and back for their country, sometimes i wonder why I ever decided to do what I do, I haven't a sensitive bone in me!
wondering when this so called wisdom is going to kick in, I've hit 21 damn it, I certainly feel about 30 but mentally still feel 6.
2 comments:
In life, we rarely get exactly what we studied in college.I'm glad to see you are still blogging. Some of my unlucky blogging buddies got deleted from my blog roll because they haven't updated for two months or more. I'm glad I kept yours.
"sometimes i wonder why I ever decided to do what I do, I haven't a sensitive bone in me!" Oh yes.
Boy, am I glad I didn't say that I was glad you didn't get the job (technically, I still haven't said it, so don't bite me. I'll get "rage", not swine flu...)
Evicted from your home? *mutters to self* "She's bonkers..."
*Now trying to transform all the negativity absorbed from this post into any positive form - scat!*
Honestly, and this is the politest way I can say this, how can you have so much blocked up energy and emotions within? Actually, I might have an idea how. But shall refrain from moralising, since you obviously have had enough of that.
"Go Let It Out" - Oasis
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